Speaking of B&N, we left that store in a tizzy today. I allowed Leah to play in the children's section for awhile as I scoped out the activity books. They had a train table and a bunch of little stuffed animals that kept her occupied. The problem came when it was time to leave. In the not too distant past, Leah would return stuffed animals to their proper shelves ("to go sleepies") when asked. I don't know if she was simply tired & cranky today, or if she was just being 2, but boy oh boy, what a meltdown! I had to carry her kicking and screaming from the store to the car because she wanted to leave with more stuffed dogs and cats. Ugh. This is becoming an increasing trend too: major meltdowns in public. At least at home, when she flips out about something or yells because she can't get her way, I can ignore her and not give her the attention that she wants. But in public, I have to deal with her. It's exhausting.
Still, as most children do, Leah makes up for it with moments of cuteness and silliness. A couple nights ago, after playing outside in the hot and sticky air, I told her she could have some ice cream. (Or "cuh cuh", as she calls it.) I opened the freezer and the first carton I pulled out was vanilla. I show Leah and she shakes her head and says, "No cuh cuh." Then, before I can even fully pull it out of the freezer, she spots the Cookies & Cream carton, points, and says, "How 'bout cuh cuh?" The girl knows what she likes, I'll tell ya. Made me laugh. :)
I read a book this week regarding motherhood. It's a short book (roughly 80 pages), which began as a letter that a mother wrote to her two young daughters: "Lift" by Kelly Corrigan. During one of Leah's naptimes, I read it cover to cover. I was so affected by it, so emotional. She tries to illustrate to them what life is like now, in the beginning, in the years they won't remember as they grow. This blog, as mundane or as silly as it's been, and not nearly as beautifully written as Corrigan's book, will hopefully be something that we can share with Leah in the future, to capture a little snippet of what her early years were like.
Corrigan wrote, "If John Lennon was right that life is what happens when you're making other plans, parenthood is what happens when everything is flipped over and spilling everywhere and you can't find a towel or a sponge or your "inside" voice." Ah, so true.
But my most favorite passage from the book is this:
"I am your mother, the first mile in your road. Me and all my obvious and hidden limitations. That means that in addition to possibly wrecking you, I have the chance to give to you what was given to me: a decent childhood, more good memories than bad, some values, a sense of tribe, a run at happiness. You can't imagine how seriously I take that - even as I fail you. Mothering you is the first thing of consequence that I have ever done."
Love you, Leah. Terrible twos, meltdowns, and all.