Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Bring on the Zombie Frogs!

Leah will be 18 months old on Saturday.  In the last year and a half, she has survived a housing crisis, a financial crisis, a gas shortage, a historic drought, a resulting water shortage, record unemployment, rising crime, record snowfall, a record flood, and a couple of Mavericks.  

So what's next?  Well, if you're religious, you might think that locusts are the next plague.  If so, you haven't seen the bugs in Georgia.  Have you ever heard that the south is a little behind the times?  The bug life is simply Jurassic.  The cute bugs are still cute, such as Ladybugs, the only difference is that they are the size of your thumb.  Maybe the next plague will be something like the river flowing blood.  Again, Georgia's dirt is red. We wouldn't know blood from yucky water anyhow.  This leaves us with frogs. Better yet, frogs raining from the sky. It happened in the Bible, or at least a weird Tom Cruise movie.  In honor of Halloween, they may as well be Zombie Frogs!

Leah was born over 540 days ago.  She had complications at birth, which caused an emergency C-section.  She spent the first couple days of her life in the hospital's NICU in an oxygen tent to help her breathing.  She has weathered more storms (health, weather, economic, societal) than she is even aware of.  She is a tough little kid; determined and independent.  She wouldn't have any problem with a swarm of undead amphibians.

Dodge's tail whacking her in the face is a slightly different story.

[Dan] - or is it Frog Zombies?

4 comments:

  1. OK honey, I think you need to stop staying up late. Frog Zombies? Really?

    I like the "couple of Mavericks" remark though. Ha. ;)

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  2. It's funny you should mention frog zombies. I came across some information on that very topic the other day:

    Through the advent of the modern media, the public has become aware of the existence and imminent threat of zombies. Even a broad understanding of zombie classifications will increase the likelihood of survival during any undead encounter. The most respected and complete compendium of zombie related knowledge is a part of the Encyclopedia: Earth, published by J.R.L. Here is an excerpt:
    My son, the seventeenth species of Earth that can be zombified are frogs. Frog Zombies - not to be confused with Toad Zombies or Rob Zombie - have two subtypes, Amphibthrope and Zog.
    The Amphibthrope is the least common of the two subtypes. This frog is not infectious and can only pass its mutation through reproduction. The Amphibthrope thrives on the shame and humiliation of its victims. It will lure a person by using an upbeat crooner’s song. Once enthralled, the person affected believes they have captured a singing frog. They seek fame and glory through their discovery only to be shocked at the Amphibthropes silence. Victims continue to fail in auditioning the singing frog until they are left alone and penniless. At first glance, the Amphibthrope resembles an ordinary frog. However, when the proper conditions are met, the frog shifts into its mutated form. The mutations are blatant and resemble a felt top hat and a cane. If you come across an Amphibthrope, it is recommended that you dispose of it in a shoebox below the cement foundation of a skyscraper.
    The second and more common subtype of Frog Zombie is the Zog. Short for ‘zombie-frog’, the Zog is a frog that has become infected with the Croaken Virus - not to be confused with the Krippen Virus. A Zog can create other Zogs through the transmission of bodily fluids, such as blood or mucosa. The Croaken virus is not contagious to humans, but direct contact with infected fluids will subjugate the human to the Zogs will. Zogs are easily identified by their persistent moaning of ‘Cuisses.’ This is believed to be a disambiguation of ‘Cuisses de Grenouilles,’ a French delicacy. This inference is substantiated because Zogs feed on the thighs of other frogs instead of brains, as the human species of zombie does. Unfortunately, a story published by the Brothers Grimm known as ‘The Frog Prince’ has resulted in the enslavement of entire cities and occasionally nations (see Austria, circa 1914) Often the cry from a Zog is mistaken for the word ‘kisses’ and children will comply in an attempt to receive either a cursed prince, three wishes or an inexpensive high. Beware their zombie cries, lest ye kneel before Zog!


    Sent from my iPhone

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  3. Oh my goodness, Bob, don't encourage him! LOL

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